I sit, naked, knee's drawn up to my chest, on the bathtub floor
The water pours down from the shower head, warm and soothing on my neck and back
Forehead resting on the tops of my knee's- hot tears course down my cheeks freely
Mingling with the running water, they too join the excess running down the drain
Frustration, stress, heartache leave me feeling exposed......vulnerable
My mind wanders over various pain, fears, angers unresolved
Purging myself of the ugliness of bile's I carry within
Releasing it the only way I know how, my only comfort - my arms wrapped tightly around me
A part of me sneers at how soft I've become in my years
Reminding me I have only myself to blame for part of the woes escaping me now
These were choices I made, I shouldn't be crying over spilt milk
Just forgot how exhausting being the stronger, better person was
There was a time I would have never gone out on a limb, never put up with crap
Even if I deigned to climb the bloody tree, make an effort, getting knocked down, hard
Would have had me picking my ass up, dusting it off and walking away without a backward glance
Laughing, pitying those who kept attempting to climb back up, kept beating a dead horse
Standing up, wiping away the last of my tears, I come to a resolution
A realisation of the need to blend who I was with who I am
See things for what they are, accept them...even embrace it, then walk til there's a reason not to
But most of all, live life on MY terms, I am the only one who can make me happy or sad
Somewhere a long the way, I forgot that
